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From Beyond the Sun

US Safety Agency to Consider Ban on Gas Stoves Amid Health Fears

Early 20th Century poet Sylvia Plath (above) after accidentally being killed by a gas stove in 1963

Hector Salamanca Voted North America’s Most Vicious Spelling Bee Judge

Hector Salamanca (above) after being voted North America’s Most Vicious Spelling Bee Judge for the 22nd consecutive year

Tom Brady “A Little Surprised” To Be Ranked 37th Best Quarterback of All Time

Brady (center) named the 37th best quarterback of all time, one behind Warren Moon (left), and one higher than underrated journeyman Vinny Testaverde (right)

Some Angry that They Still Have Not Received “One Red Nickel” of Warren Buffett’s Money

Buffett (above) pledged to give away 99% of his wealth, estimated to be in excess of $100 billion dollars, leaving some to wonder when their checks will arrive

Poll: Most Americans Don’t Understand State Farm Quarterback Commercials

A recent poll shows that the vast majority of Americans do not know “what in the fuck is going on” in any of the dozens of State Farm Insurance commercials featuring Aaron Rodgers or Patrick Mahomes

NASA Announces that it will be Sending a Man to the Moon for the First — errr, BACK to the Moon! We Went There Already, Now We’re Totally Going Back 

There’s us on the moon, folks. We were totally there already.