The Greatest Song Parody of All Time

What are the elements of a good song parody?

At the most basic level, all song parodies mimic a familiar original song, and do so for comic effect.  The point of a song parody is that it has to be funny.  That’s the beginning and end of the analysis. 

Mimicking a song by itself is not funny.  As an analogy, there are lots of talented people out there who do spot-on imitations of other people. But if the person doesn’t do something funny with it, it’s useless.  Like a fart in the wind.   

Alfred Matthew “Weird Al” Yankovic has set the gold standard for song parodies for almost fifty years.  He is the undisputed master at it because he is not only a high-level musician – both inventive as a writer and skilled as a performer – but he is naturally funny.  His approach is always to deliver the song with the utmost seriousness, and with great intensity, because he knows it’s funnier to do it that way.  He often uses an accordion in his songs, sometimes including sound effects.  Why?  Because those things, if used well, can be funny.       

Yankovic made his mark in the 1980s by parodying hit songs from that era, famously including Michael Jackson’s hits Beat It (Eat It) and Bad (Fat), but also Madonna’s Like a Virgin (Like a Surgeon) and Queen’s Another One Bites the Dust (Another One Rides the Bus). He often goes the extra mile by creating videos around his songs, parodying not only the music but also the performers.  However, early Weird Al was just a vinyl record and your imagination.          

Even for a master like Weird Al, some of his parodies are better than others.  The Michael Jackson ones are fine, but the topical structure of those songs has its limits.  Despite always bringing maximum effort, there is a natural ceiling to how funny food references can be.  The inherent plight of the song parody as a musical form is that their popularity hinges upon the popularity of the original song, not the quality of the parody.  For example, there is nothing wrong with Like a Surgeon (Cuttin’ for the very first time), but there is too vast a gulf between Madonna’s song and the parody lyrics.  The only reason it’s about a surgeon is that it rhymes with virgin.  That’s not enough.  The resulting song probably maximizes the possibilities of the bit, but the mental connection to the original song is too attenuated to make an enduring impact. 

By contrast, his most famous song parody over the past twenty years is also one of his best, Amish Paradise, a parody of Coolio’s Gangsta's Paradise. [Editor’s note: that song came out in 1996, which is actually almost thirty years ago.] In this song Yankovic devises a framework where every beat of the song is in inherent conflict with the original music.  The violent, materialistic, brash world of the gangster versus the peaceful, regressive, humble world of the Pennsylvania Dutch.  This built in structure leads to lines such as:

And I've been milkin' and plowin' so long that
Even Ezekiel thinks that my mind is gone

Think you're really righteous?
Think you're pure in heart?
Well, I know I'm a million times as humble as thou art

Now THAT is a parody that rises to the next level.

As great as Amish Paradise is, and it is great, it’s not even Weird Al’s masterpiece. In fact, there is such a clear gold medal winner for that title, that I fear it may be insulting to have to point it out. But here goes nothing.   

The greatest song parody of all time is Weird Al Yankovic’s I Want a New Duck. 

The original reference song is I Want a New Drug, by Huey Lewis and the News.  If you are unfamiliar with either the parody or the original, the only response is this: you’re welcome.

First, spend a minute with the original.  (It’s a solid song, and Huey Lewis is an underrated rock and roll artist, even though it does not account for the inexplicable Huey Lewis Broadway show.)

Now, Weird Al’s take.            

In a little over three minutes, Yankovic bombards the listener with several levels of comedic brilliance.  This is not a one-note bit.  The song is filled with multiple duck zoological references.  It has double-meaning plays on words, all duck-related.  Musically, it not only perfectly mirrors the key, instrumentation, and vocalization of both Huey Lewis AND the News, but follows the lyrical structure of the original line for line.  The real kicker is when you realize that’s it’s more than just a string of jokes.  It tells a story that is so profoundly absurd that one can only marvel.     

I want a new duck
One that won't try to bite
One that won't chew a hole in my socks
One that won't quack all night

I want a new duck
One with big webbed feet
One that knows how to wash my car
And keep his room real neat

One that won't raid the ice box
One that'll stay in shape
One that's never gonna try to migrate or escape
Or I'll tie him up with duck tape

It is reasonable at first to assume that Yankovic wants the new duck as a pet, but the lyrics suggest that the duck he envisions is more of a housemate, even a companion.  After all, pets don’t normally occupy their own rooms.  But there is a looming tension, as Yankovic contemplates a future power struggle between him and the bird, even leaving open the possibility that drastic and coercive measures might be necessary in the event of insubordination.  First, it’s a reference to “duck tape.”  Later, as we will see, it devolves into an overt threat of violence.  

I want a new duck
A mallard I think
One that won't make a mess of my house
Or build a nest in the bathroom sink

I want a new duck
One that won't steal my beer
One that won't stick his bill in my mail
One that knows the duck stops here

One that won't drive me crazy waddling all around
One who'll teach me how to swim and help me not to drown
And show me how to get down
How to get down baby

Get it?

Yes, he adds the “get it” here to make sure the audience understands what just happened.  Did YOU get it?  Did you notice that Yankovic just inserted the greatest duck-related play on words in the history of Western Music?  “One who’ll show me how to get down.”  Get it?  But even that marvelous stroke is quickly surpassed by what happens next.  At this point, Yankovic deviates from the instrumental section in the original recording by adding the vocalized Quack Quack Quack Quack Quack, including a duck-horn sound.  This is perhaps the most inspired touch in an already inspired song, especially when considered in the context of the story being told.  The repeated quacking harkens back to the haunting din that once kept Yankovic up all night, and which hints at the scar tissue that underlies this unhinged and increasingly manic list of grievances, deftly disguised as a wish-list.    

I want a new duck
Not a swan or a goose
Just a drake I can dress real cute
Think I'm gonna name him Bruce

I want a new duck
Not a quail or an owl
One that won't molt too much
One that won't smell too fowl

One that won't beg for breadcrumbs
Hangin' around all day
He'd better mind his manners
Better do just what I say
Or he's gonna be duck pâté, duck pâté, yeah, yeah

Why does Yankovic feel the need to make these preemptive threats?  Here, the original Huey Lewis song is instructive.  In the original recording, Lewis sings of wanting a “new” drug, and the entire song is a list of negative qualities of the “old” drugs he presumably already tried.  How else would he know about the paranoia, insomnia, and other physical and psychological side effects of those other narcotics?  The implication here is that Lewis is singing from experience—in other words, he has tried all those old drugs and has found every one of them to be lacking.

Like Huey Lewis, Yankovic knows exactly what he doesn’t want.  He recounts a litany of negative behaviors that one suspects can only be attributed to his previous duck housemate.  These generally revolve around the same central question: who’s going to be in charge, me or the duck?  Is the new duck going to honor the primacy of the male human host, or is he going to find ways to subvert his authority?  The only way to understand the song is that Yankovic is speaking from experience.

It is this dark—and absurd—layer that hoists I Want a New Duck into the pantheon of song parodies.  I mean songs.

Finally, it should be noted that this seriousness is part of the secret of Weird Al’s appeal.  He doesn’t laugh through his songs, even this one.  In fact, if you watch 30 seconds of Weird Al performing this song live, you know that that is not a man half-assing it, cracking duck jokes.  This is a man invested in his art.  

That performance, like this post, is as serious as a heart a-quack.       

Postscript:

My favorite Weird Al Wikipedia entry:

Paul McCartney, also a Yankovic fan, refused Yankovic permission to record a parody of Wings' "Live and Let Die", titled "Chicken Pot Pie", because, according to Yankovic, McCartney is "a strict vegetarian and he didn't want a parody that condoned the consumption of animal flesh". Though McCartney suggested possibly changing the parody to "Tofu Pot Pie", Yankovic, who is also a vegetarian, found this would not fit the lyrics he had written, which featured the sound of a chicken throughout the chorus.